Why is the family important in the plan of salvation? What does this mean for you and your family?

In 1995 the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints released a proclamation entitled “The Family: A Proclamation to the World.”  This proclamation stands firmly and boldly and declares the standards of God in regards to the family unit. The proclamation states:

WE, THE FIRST PRESIDENCY and the Council of the Twelve Apostles of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, solemnly proclaim that marriage between a man and a woman is ordained of God and that the family is central to the Creator’s plan for the eternal destiny of His children.

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The Family is not a mere convenience, but rather, the center for God’s plan of happiness. Today, Satan attacks the family unit through means of pornography, the acceptance of single parenting, cohabitation, and the unpopularity of marriage. It is not wonder that Satan would demean and belittle something so central to God’s plan. If he is successful in destroying the family unit, then he has won a major battle.

The family begins with a couple, a man and a women who have been lawfully wed, and if members of the Church, sealed in the temple for time and all eternity.

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HUSBAND AND WIFE have a solemn responsibility to love and care for each other and for their children. “Children are an heritage of the Lord” (Psalm 127:3). Parents have a sacred duty to rear their children in love and righteousness, to provide for their physical and spiritual needs, and to teach them to love and serve one another, observe the commandments of God, and be law-abiding citizens wherever they live. Husbands and wives—mothers and fathers—will be held accountable before God for the discharge of these obligations.

Parents are to care for their children’s physical needs, as well as their spiritual needs as they raise their children to be law-abiding citizens with lives focused on Christ. This proclamation is not just for members of the Church. Think of the effects this proclamation could have on society if all were to follow its teachings. If parents took responsibility to teach their children to obey the law, to be accountable for their decisions, and not only that, but to love them unconditionally. 

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The proclamation goes on:

THE FAMILY is ordained of God. Marriage between man and woman is essential to His eternal plan. Children are entitled to birth within the bonds of matrimony, and to be reared by a father and a mother who honor marital vows with complete fidelity. Happiness in family life is most likely to be achieved when founded upon the teachings of the Lord Jesus Christ. Successful marriages and families are established and maintained on principles of faith, prayer, repentance, forgiveness, respect, love, compassion, work, and wholesome recreational activities. By divine design, fathers are to preside over their families in love and righteousness and are responsible to provide the necessities of life and protection for their families. Mothers are primarily responsible for the nurture of their children. In these sacred responsibilities, fathers and mothers are obligated to help one another as equal partners. Disability, death, or other circumstances may necessitate individual adaptation. Extended families should lend support when needed.

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Children are to be reared by a Father and a Mother. Parents have important and distinct attributes that they are able to pass on to their children. There are great blessings that come from having a Father and a Mother in the home. Children are also deserving of parents who honor complete fidelity within their marriage. While we accept that all are not members of our Faith we believe that happiness is best found when children are raised on Christ-centered principles such as faith, prayer, repentance, forgiveness, and love. While many may not believe in Christ, it is hard to argue with principles taught by him such as respect, love, compassion, hard work, and play.

Lastly the proclamation states: 

WE CALL UPON responsible citizens and officers of government everywhere to promote those measures designed to maintain and strengthen the family as the fundamental unit of society. 

Again, these principles are not just for members of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. If citizens worldwide were to uphold these standards society would be safer, happier, and more successful. The family is the foundations of God's plan of happiness. God wants us to be happy, and has given us principles to abide by in order to achieve that happiness. 

The Sanctity of Life

What is life and why is it important?

In 1 Corinthians 6:19-20 it states,

What? Know ye not that your body is the temple of the Holy Ghost which is in you, which ye have of God, and ye are not your own? For ye are bought with a price: therefore glorify God in your body, and in your spirit, which are God’s.

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Our bodies are a temple given to us from our Heavenly Father. Each body is sacred as it contains our spirit, the very essence of ourselves. Our spirit lives on through the eternities and because of the Resurrection of Christ our bodies too, can reunite after death.

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This gives us a small idea of why our bodies are so important, but what does that mean and why does it matter? Does this change the way we act or behave once we understand this concept?

According to the Old English Dictionary, 1989, the earliest meanings of the word sacred regard the consecration of the body and blood of Christ in the sacrament. Cynthia L. Hallen states that “Life is sacred because Jesus Christ is the ultimate source or fountain of life through His work in the Creation and through His sacrifice in the Atonement.

Everything that Christ did, he did that we might live, use and experience our agency, and come to live with him again.

Russell M. Nelson speaks of a child’s life when he states, “Yes, life is precious! No one can cuddle a cherished newborn baby, look into those beautiful eyes, feel the little fingers, and caress that miraculous creation without deepening reverence for life and for our Creator.”

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Abortion is a worldwide debate among society today. Women fight for the right to their own body, and what goes on inside it. However, didn't we just learn that our body is now our own, but rather, we are “bought with a price,” and we are therefore to “glorify God in [our] body and [our] spirit. 

I am pro-choice and pro-life. We came to this Earth to make a choice. By banning abortion we are in no way banishing the ability to choose. However, a choice was made when the individual chose to involve themselves in sexual relationships. There are risks and consequences with sexual behavior and creating a child is one of them. For those who did not make that choice, such as in cases of rape or incest, or in the situation in which childbirth would put the Mother at risk, of course we are not ignorant. We respect the rights and in no way inhibit those victims from an abortion. When the choice was willingly made, however, the consequences that follow exists and it is not fair to state that abortion is acceptable as an after-thought. 

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Life is precious, the most precious thing in existence. If that is true, then why even test the waters? We may not know the moment that life begins to exist, whether it is upon conception, or birth, however, why even test the waters. Who would want to be responsible for the taking of a human life? 

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Many resources are available to women and families throughout the world who are not ready to raise a child. Couples weep throughout the world because of the inability to have children and are ready and able to care for those, who others may not feel ready for. There is always another option, and when it comes to a sacred human life, we should regard it with the utmost respect and sanctity. 

Same Sex-Marriage: Loving Others and Living with Differences

I have struggled for the past few years with my feelings regarding same-sex marriage. As the world has become more liberal and more accepting of those who experience same-sex attraction I was often confused. I had been raised in the church and taught that same-sex attraction is something that people struggle with, however, the church does not support it and does not encourage it. When proposition 8 came about and the church asked members to help not pass the proposition I was confused. Here we are in a church in which we are taught to love others and we have been persecuted for our beliefs, yet we wouldn't allow others to practice their own beliefs. I knew little regarding proposition 8 and little regarding the church's actual position and actions towards those with same-sex attraction.

If you google Same Sex Attraction and LDS the first page that comes up is this webpage by the church. In this article is states:

The Church’s affirmation of marriage as being between a man and a woman “neither constitutes nor condones any kind of hostility toward gays and lesbians.”⁶ On the contrary, many Church leaders have spoken clearly about the love and respect with which all people are to be treated. Former Church president Gordon B. Hinckley (1910-2008) told members who are attracted to the same sex: “Our hearts reach out to [you]. We remember you before the Lord, we sympathize with you, we regard you as our brothers and sisters.” President Boyd K. Packer affirmed, “We do not reject you. … We cannot reject you. … We will not reject you, because we love you.”

The Church has advocated for rights for same-sex couples regarding “hospitalization and medical care, fair housing and employment rights, or probate rights, so long as these do not infringe on the integrity of the traditional family or the constitutional rights of churches.”⁷ In Salt Lake City, for example, the Church supported ordinances aimed at protecting gay residents from discrimination in housing and employment. 

The church does not want to infringe on the right of others and on the constitutional rights of all individuals. However, they choose to practice and support the sanctity of marriage and family life. 

My prayers were further answered by Elder Oaks talk in the last general conference in October 2014 titled, Loving Others and Living with Differences. 

In this talk he stated:

The gospel has many teachings about keeping the commandments while living among people with different beliefs and practices. The teachings about contention are central. When the resurrected Christ found the Nephites disputing over the manner of baptism, He gave clear directions on how this ordinance should be performed. Then He taught this great principle:

“There shall be no disputations among you, as there have hitherto been; neither shall there be disputations among you concerning the points of my doctrine, as there have hitherto been.

“For verily, verily I say unto you, he that hath the spirit of contention is not of me, but is of the devil, who is the father of contention, and he stirreth up the hearts of men to contend with anger, one with another.

“Behold, this is … my doctrine, that such things should be done away” (3 Nephi 11:28–30; emphasis added).

The church does not support or condone the spirit of contention but rather they teach the principle of love. 

Elder Oaks goes on: 

On the subject of public discourse, we should all follow the gospel teachings to love our neighbor and avoid contention. Followers of Christ should be examples of civility. We should love all people, be good listeners, and show concern for their sincere beliefs. Though we may disagree, we should not be disagreeable. Our stands and communications on controversial topics should not be contentious. We should be wise in explaining and pursuing our positions and in exercising our influence. In doing so, we ask that others not be offended by our sincere religious beliefs and the free exercise of our religion. We encourage all of us to practice the Savior’s Golden Rule: “Whatsoever ye would that men should do to you, do ye even so to them” (Matthew 7:12).

We are to love one another. 

As Latter-Day Saints we need to make an effort to love those around us. So many in the world today are confused about the stance of the LDS church. They believe that we may be prejudice or unfair. We need to reach out and show concern for others, no matter their circumstance. We are to follow the first and second great commandments, 1) To love our God, and 2) to love our neighbor. 

Crucibles and Healing

The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints recently released a video called The Refiner's Fire. In this video the church displays a woman who has suffered immense tragedy in life. This is one of the most challenging questions that the world faces, "If there is a God, why would he allow such terrible pain and suffering?" President James E. Faust explained by stating:

Into every life there come the painful, despairing days of adversity and buffeting. There seems to be a full measure of anguish, sorrow, and often heartbreak for everyone, including those who earnestly seek to do right and be faithful. The thorns that prick, that stick in the flesh, that hurt, often change lives which seem robbed of significance and hope. This change comes about through a refining process which often seems cruel and hard. In this way the soul can become like soft clay in the hands of the Master in building lives of faith, usefulness, beauty, and strength. For some, the refiner's fire causes a loss of belief and faith in God, but those with eternal perspective understand that such refining is part of the perfection process (1979, p. 53). 

Adversity is inevitable and unavoidable in this life. Macduff said it perfectly in Act 4, Scene 3 of Macbeth when he states, "Did Heaven look on and would not take their part?" Jon Bytheway put together a compilation of scripture to answer these questions. 

1. 1 Nephi 11:7 

In this scripture we read, "And I said unto him: I know that he loveth his children; nevertheless, I do not know the meaning of all things." 

We do not have the answers for all things, we don't know why some are called upon to suffer greater trials than others, however, we do know that God loveth his children. 

Brother Truman G. Madsen once asked President Hugh B. Brown of the First Presidency (1883–1975) why the Lord would put Abraham through the experience of being asked to sacrifice his own son. Obviously God knew that Abraham would be willing to do anything God commanded, and if that was so, why did the Lord put him through such a test? President Brown answered, “Abraham needed to learn something about Abraham” (Joseph Smith the Prophet [1989], 93).

Sometimes our trials aren't to prove ourselves, but they help us develop characteristics that we couldn't obtain otherwise. No one builds muscle by sitting at home, yet sometimes we are asked to strengthen and exercise our spiritual muscles and to exercise our faith in order to let it grow. 

2. Moses 7: 26-33

This is one of my all-time favorite scriptures. In this scripture Enoch sees a vision in which Satan has a great chain around the Earth. It then goes on to state, "And it came to pass that the God of heaven looked upon the residue of the people, and he wept; and Enoch bore record of it, saying: How is it that the heavens weep, and shed forth their tears as the rain upon the mountains?" 

Why is it that we often don't realize how hard it must be for God to watch the trials and afflictions we pass through?

"The Lord said unto Enoch: Behold these thy brethren; they are the workmanship of mine own hands, and I gave unto them their knowledge, in the day I created them; and in the Garden of Eden, gave I unto man his agency; And unto thy brethren have I said, and also given commandment, that they should love one another, and that they should choose me, their Father; but behold, they are without affection, and they hate their own blood." 

We are God's children. How much must it pain him to see us fight with one another, to harm one another and hate each other. We learned in Nephi that God loves his children, and we learn in Moses the love that God has for us and of his compassion and empathy. 

3. Alma 14:13 

What about those times in which we see others pass through trials, tragedy, and even death and we are left unscathed? Survivors guilt is real and we often wonder, why them? Why not us? Why must one person, or one family, or one nation suffer while we are blessed. Alma and Amulek experienced this trial as they watched those they taught the gospel burn at the stake. 

Amulek asked “How can we witness this awful scene?” Amulek asks.

Alma answers: “The Spirit constraineth me that I must not stretch forth mine hand; for behold the Lord receiveth them up unto himself, in glory.”

Amulek says, “Perhaps they will burn us also.”

Alma replies, “Be it according to the will of the Lord. But, behold, our work is not finished; therefore they burn us not” (Alma 14:10–13, emphasis added).

Our work is not finished, we still have a mission to fulfill. 

4. Alma 7:11-12

The Atonement is not just for sinners. In Alma 7 we read, "“And he shall go forth, suffering pains and afflictions and temptations of every kind; and this that the word might be fulfilled which saith he will take upon him the pains and the sicknesses of his people.

“And he will take upon him death, that he may loose the bands of death which bind his people; and he will take upon him their infirmities, that his bowels may be filled with mercy, according to the flesh, that he may know according to the flesh how to succor his people” (Alma 7:11–12).

Jon Bytheway states: The words “sin” or “sins” do not appear anywhere in those two verses. But notice the other words—things in addition to sins that Jesus took upon him: pains, afflictions, temptations, sicknesses, and infirmities. Alma and Amulek must have relied on the Atonement of Christ to get them through the sadness, the nightmares, and the emotional trauma of the tragedy in Ammonihah. We must rely on the Atonement to help us through our personal tragedies as well.

5. D&C 101: 32-36

We learn in this scripture that ultimately we will know all things. Sometimes the hard part of trials is our inability to understand the "why?" We wonder why we must pass through this trail and what the purpose is of our experiences, and ultimately the Lord answers and states, “Yea, verily I say unto you, in that day when the Lord shall come, he shall reveal all things—

“Things which have passed, and hidden things which no man knew, things of the earth, by which it was made, and the purpose and the end thereof” (D&C 101:32–33).

The Lord loves us, that much we know. He is a perfect being and therefore, unable to cause bad things to happen, however, the Lord may allow evil to exist in the world in order that we might perform our agency and learn and grow so that we may become perfected and ready to receive our kingdom in Heaven. 

A Family That Plays Together Stays Together

Families that play together stay together, especially when their play is uplifting and wholesome. Family vacations, holidays, birthday celebrations, and other activities build strong bonds and feelings of self-worth. The phrase “Remember when we…” is sure to bring love and laughter in the years to come.

Here are a list of fun activities that my husband and I enjoy together, and a list of things that we would like to do:

Hiking
Canoeing
Fishing
Playing at the park with our dogs
Playing basketball at the park
Playing catch 
Playing Frisbee golf on our made-up course around the neighborhood
Watching our favorite TV show
Playing board games/cards
Visiting downtown SLC
Watching a movie in the back of our pick up truck
Building a fort in the living room
Going to a play
Stargazing
Museums
Attending local activities (Steel Days, Rodeo, Concerts)
Making homemade ice cream
Attending UVU sports games
Bee's Games
Read a book together
Going on a bike ride
Long boarding around the neighborhood or down Provo Canyon
Swimming or Seven Peaks, Hot tubing
Bowling
House hunting
Going to an arcade

There are plenty of activities that you can participate in together as a family. Get out of the house and do something together. Participate in activities that allow you to have fun and talk to one another. 

The Power of Temple Covenants

The temple is equipped with many wonderful and miraculous powers, one of which is the saving power it obtains in order to reunite families beyond the veil, and to save wayward children.

A statement made my Elder Orson F. Whitney contains the essence of this promise:

“The Prophet Joseph Smith declared—and he never taught more comforting doctrine—that the eternal sealings of faithful parents and the divine promises made to them for valiant service in the Cause of Truth, would save not only themselves, but likewise their posterity. Though some of the sheep may wander, the eye of the Shepherd is upon them, and sooner or later they will feel the tentacles of Divine Providence reaching out after them and drawing them back to the fold. Either in this life or the life to come, they will return. They will have to pay their debt to justice; they will suffer for their sins; and may tread a thorny path; but if it leads them at last, like the penitent Prodigal, to a loving and forgiving father’s heart and home, the painful experience will not have been in vain. Pray for your careless and disobedient children; hold on to them with your faith. Hope on, trust on, till you see the salvation of God.”

In the Doctrine and Covenants, Section 68 the Lord says, "And again, inasmuch as parents have children in Zion, or in any of her stakes which are organized, that teach them not to understand the doctrine of repentance, faith in Christ the Son of the living God, and of baptism and the gift of the Holy Ghost by the laying on of the hands, when eight years old, the sin be upon the heads of the parents.”

Our responsibility as parents are to rear our children in love and righteousness. It is a divine calling which we must fulfill to the best of our ability. What about those parents, however, who feel that they have not fulfilled their calling because their child has wandered from the teachings which they have taught? 

Success in parenthood is not defined by the choices your children make, instead it is measured by the love and kindness in which you have raised and taught your children. 

I cannot imagine the love of a parent, it is deep and abiding, must like our Heavenly Fathers love for each of us. When one of our children wander, our Heavenly Father weeps with us. 

The scriptures are full of examples of righteous parents who have raised their children in love and righteousness, yet whose children have still gone astray. We read of the prodigal son, whose father welcomed him with open arms and threw a feast for his son the moment he returned. 

"President Howard W. Hunter observed that “repentance is but the homesickness of the soul, and the uninterrupted and watchful care of the parent is the fairest earthly type of the unfailing forgiveness of God.” Is not the family the nearest analogy which the Savior’s mission sought to establish?" 

For those whose children may have gone astray, or for those whose siblings struggle with disobedience, remember that they righteousness of a mother and father can work miracles in saving their children. Hold on to hope, and endure in righteousness. The Lord is the good shepherd and watches over all his sheep and he will not let them be lost. 

We do not doubt our mothers knew it.

When the Stripling Warriors went in to battle they were armed with the gospel because they had been taught by their mothers.

Our children are entering a world in which they must be armed with the armory of the gospel. The First Presidency called the parents and pleaded with them to "devote their best efforts to the teaching and rearing of their children in gospel principles which will keep them close to the Church. The home is the basis of a righteous life, and no other instrumentality can take its place or fulfill its essential functions in carrying forward this God-given responsibility (First Presidency of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, 1999).

I recently had a friend post a comment on facebook in regards to a comment similar to this given by an Apostle. The Apostle had stated that it is a mother role to stay home and rear their children in righteousness. While that comment was made in a different time than today, much of what they stated still rings true. As women, there is a higher demand for us to work outside of the home, whether it be in order to support our family or establish ourselves. The Church is not demeaning women when they ask them to stay home, rather they are helping them remember their primary and foremost responsibility.

Our first responsibility should be in the home. We have been given a call to devote our BEST efforts to the teaching and rearing of our children. The home is the basis of a righteous life. In the world we live in today where evil can lurk in our homes through our television, cell-phones, i-pads, and music, we should be doing all we can to protect our children.

While we may trust daycare to care for our children, and we may appreciate the teaching done in primary and sunday school, we cannot rely upon these sources alone for our children's understanding of gospel principles.

The best lesson is taught by example. Teach your children in daily life how to apply the Atonement. Teach them the importance of the Savior and how to speak with him through prayer, scripture study, and pondering. Most importantly, love your children. Motherhood is a calling and a wonderful opportunity, not an obligation.